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Archive for January, 2008

Walcott: Written off at 18

Posted by gwil on January 29, 2008

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It’s not often that Arsenal lose to Spurs, and it’s even rarer for them to lose in the emphatic manner that they did last Tuesday. 5-1 is miserable scoreline to lose by in a derby game, especially if your club usually walks over their (geographically) closest rivals with consummate ease, and the natural reaction in the wake of such a catastrophe is to identify a scapegoat. At White Hart Lane on Tuesday Theo Walcott was that scapegoat.

Walcott has been attracting scathing column inches since he was called up for England’s world cup squad in 2006. The inclusion of a 16 year old who had not played a minute of competitive football infuriated the assembled press, and the fact that Walcott did not appear at all in the tournament antagonised them further. Since then every article about the youngster has been written with a touch of resentment. Walcott crashed the Golden Generation’s party. Germany 2006 had been earmarked for years as the tournament where England would finally reacquaint themselves with success. So when Sven Goran Eriksson decided to use up one of the squad spaces on offering a potentially good player an experience of international competition, it really hurt the English media. By bringing in Walcott, Eriksson suggested that 2006 wasn’t as golden a generation as everyone had hoped, and that it would maybe be wiser to plan for the future. It flew in the face of all the hyperbole tossed about in the build up to the tournament. Walcott, despite not appearing in any of England’s games, became, along with the Swede, the fall guy for their failure.

Since then Walcott has struggled in club football at Arsenal, appearing sporadically and not performing with the precociousness expected of a ‘wonderkid’, and the language adopted by Fleet Street’s finest on the matter suggests that they have lost what little faith they once had in his ability. Kevin McCarra of The Guardian suggested after Arsenal’s capitulation at Spurs last week that, “Anyone unfamiliar with Walcott’s history would have classed him on Tuesday night as an 18-year-old with borderline prospects in the Premier League.” Arsene Wenger admitted that Walcott hadn’t developed as quickly as he had hoped, and the persistent rumblings of a potential loan has been taken by the press as affirmation of the youngster’s mediocrity.

Whilst it is true that Walcott has been underwhelming, some of the bile spouted about his footballing ability has been quite breathtaking. “He can’t shoot, pass, tackle, cross or hold on to the ball, he doesn’t track back or possess the footballing intelligence to make proper use of his pace, is injury prone and, according to his manager, requires a “rest” after playing 150 minutes of football in four days“, was the splenetic view of Football 365’s Peter Gill, an opinion which conveniently ignores Walcott’s better moments in the past 18 months. The two irresistible goals for England’s U-21’s against their German counterparts (apologies for extensive footage of Peter Beardsley’s face in that video) and a fantastic performance against Slavia Prague in the Champions League are evidence against Gill’s exaggerations. Yes, these high points may come infrequently, but Walcott is 18, an age where even making a first team appearance is usually seen as tremendous progress.

The problem for Walcott is that he has found himself bracketed in with the previous incumbent of the ‘wonderkid’ mantle, Wayne Rooney. Rooney was physically, as well as technically, advanced for his age. He couldn’t be bullied by the grizzled old pros. Walcott doesn’t have that luxury. He has a teenager’s physique, and blistering pace can only get you so far in such a physical league. Wenger has thus far played him on the flanks, but believes that he is far better suited to playing in the centre. Until his strength improves it is difficult to imagine him thriving in a central position, and his struggles against Spurs in the second leg of the Carling Cup prove this.

Perhaps Walcott is that rare thing: an English footballer who would be better suited to playing abroad. In Spain, for example, he would have the opportunity to play centrally and against less forceful opponents. Walcott would have more time on the ball, and would come back to England a more confident and technically astute player. Sure, you can argue that he would have to face the rigours of English football at some point but, more than anything else at the moment, Walcott needs a validation of his ability. He is only 18, and has plenty of time to develop into an excellent footballer, but a deficit of confidence can be a terminal problem. Wenger needs to act quickly to rectify this situation.

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Behind The Times: Capello/Pato (again)/Newcastle (again)

Posted by gwil on January 14, 2008

‘The Duck’ breaks his, erm, duck

Alex Pato, the wonderkid described by Claudio Ranieri as ”extraterrestrial“, justified the hyperbole last night with a rather neatly taken goal (see above) as Milan beat Napoli 5-2 . In truth Pato didn’t have the most auspicious of starts. He came very close to ruining Ronaldo’s opener , and missed two simple chances in the build up to Milan’s second. Fortunately, he improved as the game went on, and the first touch for his goal, Milan’s fifth, was lovely. He certainly has the technical skills to be a great player in years to come.

England World Cup Qualifying Fixtures

Fabio Capello and Trevor Brooking had a quick jolly over in Zagreb last weekend  and came back with a shiny new set of England fixtures:

Andorra (a) Saturday, 6 September 6 2008
Croatia (a) Wednesday, 10 September 2008
Kazakhstan (h) Saturday, 11 October 2008
Belarus (a) Wednesday, 15 October, 2008
No game – Saturday, 28 March, 2009
Ukraine (h) Wednesday, 1 April, 2009
Kazakhstan (a) Saturday, 6 June, 2009
Andorra (h) Wednesday, 10 June, 2009
No game – Saturday, 5 September, 2009
Croatia (h) Wednesday, 9 September, 2009
Ukraine (a) Saturday, 10 October, 2009
Belarus (h) Wednesday, 14 October, 2009

Why am I bringing this up? Well, mainly to pad out this slim-looking post, but also because it could be of some significance in the future. Brooking claimed that the English delegation are reasonably pleased with the outcome. “Fabio Capello wanted Croatia twice in September”. In the event England will play Croatia away in September 2008 and at home in September 2009. I assume Capello reckons that, with no summer action for English players in either ‘08 or ‘09, his squad will be relatively fresh for the September games. Capello is also probably working on the assumption that his charges will be approaching something close to match fitness by the time the Croatia games come around, thanks to the Premier League’s early start to the season. Very astute. See, he’s earning his corn already.

Any Other Business

Loads of candidates for the toon job. The most interesting suggestion comes from former chairman Sir John Hall, who has suggested Swansea manager Roberto Martinez.

It’s not all doom and gloom for Newcastle fans. Alan Smith has been given a two match ban after a truly pointless sending-off on Saturday. For anyone who missed it, Smith received a red card for dissent after complaining about United’s 6th goal. Fool.

Novel celebration in Anderlecht’s 2-0 win over Waasland on Saturday.

Gavin Peacock was talking about the best volleys ever on MOTD2 last night but neglected to include this one from Youri Djorkaeff (or that brilliant 5-a-side volley mentioned in this very blog a few weeks ago).

Watford midfielder Ali Bangura has won his appeal to stay in the country. Expect the usual xenophobic rhetoric from Richard Littlejohn and co. on the matter in the next couple of days.

I stumbled upon a nice little compilation of skillful assists. Top stuff…

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Behind the Times: Pato, Puns and the Perpetual Pain of Supporting Newcastle United

Posted by gwil on January 13, 2008

Goal o’ t’day:

Real Madrid’s Gonzalo Higuain vs Mallorca in the Copa Del Rey. Bosh.

Out of Toon/ Tyne-ly Intervention By Ashley/ Allardyce Gateshead-ed for the exit/ In need of a Toon up/ Toon-ted Love/Allardyce- All Tyne-mouth and no trousers/Chris (the) Mort(ician) pronounces Allardyce’s toon career dead/Allardyc-ing with death

Some observations:

1) Any Newcastle fan who genuinely believes that Alan Shearer is the man to drag their club out of their present malaise is an idiot. Shearer has no experience, and has not once indicated that he wants to manage the club. And to the majority of ‘toon fans who aren’t cretins: if you see some prick unfurling that ridiculous banner invoking Shearer to take the reins, smack them in the back of the head and tell them to get a grip post haste.

2)Match of the Day- useless, yet again. They’ve had Shearer in the studio on numerous occasions since he was first linked with the Newcastle job, and haven’t once pressed him on whether he fancies it or not. I’d describe that as journalistic negligence from the Beeb.

3)Allardyce’s dismissal may well spell the symbolic end of a period of tactical, functional football in the Prem. Allardyce believed in Sports Science, pre-conditioning, meticulous preparation. His misadventure at Newcastle indicates that relying on those methods alone is pure folly. Football is not Gridiron: it is a game of spontaneity, of flair, and the continued success of Manchester United and Arsenal over the past decade is testament to that. Allardyce somehow managed to distort the natural order of things while he was at Bolton, but his failure at Newcastle should serve as an indicator to other managers that the best option in football is to encourage thier charges to play with technique and inventiveness, rather than baffling them with all this complex ‘Sports Science’ business.

4) If Sunderland win tomorrow Newcastle will be 6 points off the relegation zone. It is entirely plausible that they could go down. Their next 5 games: Bolton (h), Arsenal (a), Middlesbrough (h), Villa (a), Man United (h). Wins against Bolton and Middlesbrough at home are crucial, and thus getting a new man in as soon as possible is of paramount importance.

5) More a request than an observation: Alan Smith, for the sake of football, please go to your garden shed, find a saw (or some other sharp implement) and quickly and quietly hack your legs from your torso. I’m pleading here. This shit’s gone on long enough.

‘The Duck’

It is difficult to remember a player so heavily hyped in European football as Alexandre Pato. For anyone who has not yet heard of Pato, he’s an 18 year old Brazilian striker who is set to make his bow for AC Milan against Napoli tonight. Pato, nicknamed the ‘duck’ (‘pato’ is Portuguese for, amongst other things, duck), signed from Brazilian side Internacional in the summer, but, due to a law in Italian football which prohibits teams from fielding South American players under the age of 18, has been restricted to proving his worth in training. And, judging by the gushing praise emanating from one of Milan’s most senior names, he’s not bad. Not bad at all. Paulo Maldini, possibly the finest defender EVER, said of Pato: “He has great technique and a remarkable ability to move the ball from his right foot to his left and shoot in a matter of seconds”, while BBC South American Football Correspondent Tim Vickery has said that Pato is such a phenomenal talent that when he first started training with the first team at Internacional, his new teammates were banned by the club from talking to anyone about the youngster’s staggering ability. Internacional have a history of making money by selling one or two talents a season to European clubs and they were more than a little concerned that Pato would be lured away to Europe before his value reached the 8 figure level. So they hid Pato away from the Brazilian media until he was ready to make for competitive action. On his debut, against Brazilian side Palmeiras, Pato was magnificent, scoring once and providing 2 assists, as Inter won 4-1. Pato’s value increased massively, and a year later he was sold to Milan for the huge sum of 18 million euros.

Unfortunately for anyone hoping to catch the Pato show, Milan’s game is not being televised in the UK, but anyone wishing to watch it online might want to have a look at a certain website that begins with www. and ends with myp2p.eu.

Any Other Business

..talking of outrageously talented Brazilians, here’s a compilation of one of the most talented of all: Djalminha, who played for Deportivo La Coruna a while back. Oh, and what’s that music in the background? Only Scatman’s motherf*cking World! A treat for all the senses. Well, 2 of the senses. On we go… Astounding stat of the day (taken from bbc.co.uk): “Nicholas Anelka’s move to Chelsea has seen him become the most expensive player in the history of the game. Anelka has cost a total of £87 million in the transfer market.“Christ on a bike…Carlos ‘faceache’ Tevez wasn’t the first player to come up with that rather disturbing ‘dummy‘ celebration. No, Lyon’s Brazilian striker Fred did it a few years ago after scoring a lovely goal against PSV in the Champs League. Fred also holds the record for the fastest goal ever scored in Brazilian football. 3.17 seconds. And he has a great name…

And finally….

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The F.A. Cup- Not Quite Dead Yet

Posted by gwil on January 6, 2008

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Poor old F.A. Cup. Before yesterday’s flurry of fixtures most of the articles contemplating the current state of the competition were desperately bleak eulogies, lamenting the fact that no club outside of the dreaded ‘Big Four’ has won the competition since Everton’s Paul Rideout looped a header past Peter Schmeichel in 1995, or bemoaning the disparity between top and bottom which has led to Premier League clubs resting their first choice players when the potential giant-killers come calling. Skip to 4.45 and more than a few ‘Cupsets’ later, and an entirely different argument for the death of the cup has been raised. The Premiership clubs who suffered ignominy at the hands of lower league clubs did so because they couldn’t care less about the competition. They had more important things to tend to, such as finishing mid-table in the Premier League. Such a stance has been supported by comments from Dave Kitson, who suggested that he and his club, Reading, regarded the cup as little more than a hindrance. The BBC, usually overenthusiastic cheerleaders for the competiton, spent most of yesterday evening debating whether the romance of the cup was dead, and came to the general conclusion that yes, it most definately was.

All of which paints a fairly convincing argument for the demise of a footballing institution. Except that, if you looked again more closely, you would most likely have noticed that it was largely nonsense. Yesterday was a fantastic day for the F.A. Cup, filled with glorious tales of plucky underdogs sticking one to their top division overlords. We were treated to the rather heartwarming image of Chasetown celebrating their 3-1 defeat to Cardiff as though they’d just won a ‘Planet Earth XI vs Bloodthirsty Aliens F.C.’ match for the future of mankind. We read pre-match comments from Sven and the ’still-rather-mysterious’ Juande Ramos, who both promised to take the competition very, very seriously, and duly did by putting out full-strength teams, despite the fact that Ramos’ Spurs were facing that apathetic lot at Reading F.C and so could have quite legitimately sent out the Under-8’s. And yes, some teams did have the gall to rest players. But, on the whole they paid for their actions with humiliating defeat. Which was fantastic entertainment for the rest of us.

So, why the doom and gloom? Well, one might put the BBC’s denunciation of the cup down to the fact that ITV are taking over the broadcasting duties from 2008/2009. Maybe Auntie thought that, if they slated the competition enough this season ,no one would bother to watch the next time it reared its disgraced head. As for the downbeat stance worn by the rest of the media? Well, the death of the F.A. Cup fits in quite neatly with the general navel-gazing tone prevalent in football journalism at large at the moment. Every season the competition has to be scrutinised, contextualised and compartmentalised. No event in football is allowed to exist on its own; it has to be roughly forced into a general theme or trend. And every year the F.A. Cup is held up as the definitive emblem for the demise of the beautiful game. It’s a shame really, because if the press ceased trying to take a wider view of things and simply took yesterday’s cup action at face value, they would have probably enjoyed themselves far more than they actually did.

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Behind The Times: 04/01/2008

Posted by gwil on January 4, 2008


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Stephen Hunt: Coming soon to a production of ‘Oliver!’ near you.

Goal of the day:

Rachid Offrany vs Ajax. He plays for VVV in Holland.

The F.A: Utterly Inept- Part 3645675245

Nery Castillo couldn’t make his debut for Manchester City against Newcastle on Wednesday because he hadn’t received his international clearance:

“Although the transfer window officially opens at midnight on New Year’s Day it stays shut in this country because the Football Association is closed for the Bank Holiday and players cannot be pre-registered.

Regulations state that all the finished paperwork has to be with the authorities at noon the day before a game therefore ruling Castillo out of the trip to Newcastle United on January 2.”

So, despite the fact that there was a full set of fixtures in all four divisions on New Years Day, the F.A. were still on their holidays. Brilliant.

What’s that ‘A’ celebration all about, eh?

According to this Daily Mail article it’s all to do with some website that encourages the yoof of today to look for positive role models in society. Which is good, I suppose. But a bit boring. I was hoping it was the footballing equivalent of the Masonic handshake, or something. Ho hum.

Any Other Business

Derby County seem hell-bent on getting relegated with the lowest points total ever, and to aid them in this cause they’ve signed Danny Mills on loanBeckham’s training with l’Arse. Why the hell isn’t anyone trying to sign him on a short term loan like United did with Henrik Larsson last season? Granted, the suits in charge of Major League Soccer might be concerned about their prize draw receiving an injury or suffering from fatigue, but a couple of months playing in the Prem would be equally likely to have Beckham firing on all cylinders come the start of the new MLS season…Rodney Marsh is threatening to return his England caps to the F.A. in the wake of Capello’s appointment. If the prospect of having a foreigner as coach of the national team outrages him so, surely he should have returned his caps back in 2000 when Sven was appointed?Idiot…Valencia midfielder David Albelda is attempting to take legal action against the club after coach Ronald Koeman told him that he will never play for Los Ches again. Albelda is demanding that his contract is terminated and a compensatory fee be paid to him. The best bit about this tale is that in Spain it is standard practice for every player to have a minimum fee release clause, and apparently Albelda expects Valencia to pay him an amount on par with his release clause in compensation. That fee? 60 million Euros. You have to admire the man’s audacity…Apparently we were all wrong about Titus Bramble….

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